Ok so I haven't had much time to get on here and write. My family is gearing up for a big move. We are buying a house that we have had our eye on for two years now. My heart and head are always playing catch up these days. I know that God has moved in a big way to provide this house for us but I would give it all back to have my sweet Brinley here with us. I am mustering up all that I can to be excited for this move but it is a struggle. I am constantly thinking about how much Brinley would have loved this adventure, sharing a new room with her two sisters, exploring in the woods behind the new house... I know that she would have wanted this for us, but I don't want it without her. I find myself feeling like I am somehow benefiting from her death and it turns my stomach because I would live in a tent just to have her by my side.
I'm reading an awesome book by Beth Moore called, "Get Out of That Pit." In the last chapter she describes that we should make no mistake that people are fighting daily to stay out of their pit and making a choice to rely on God instead. I just finished telling my husband last night that it was daunting and even scary to think that I would be fighting this battle for the rest of my life not to be in a pit. Choosing to wake up every morning and trust that God was going to get me through and not wallowing in my situation. Believe me I'd rather be wallowing sometimes! And then my good friend Rachael sent me an e-mail this morning telling me that she was searching God's word for His promises to her and she found Lamentations 3:22 "Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning, great is Your faithfulness." And then she said that she claimed it for herself and was praying over it for my family too. How amazing when God's word speaks! It was just what I needed to know that in my struggle God's mercy will be new every morning. I don't have to be afraid to make the choice to stay away from the pit because He is there to help me keep clear from it. I covet your prayers over my fight to stay out of that pit!