Sunday, January 4, 2009

Happy New Year?

I didn't write much in December did I? Not much of anything and a whole lot of everything happened this month too. I just can't decide if it was because I was too busy with the season or if I was too busy avoiding really thinking about the season without her. Maybe a little bit of both.
As much as I dreaded Christmas without our girl there was this other part of me that continually searched for joy. My God was faithful to provide! I'm certain that this was a choice. The more I focused on seeing other families celebrate their "normal" Christmases the more I hurt. But the more I focused on what I have been blessed with this December the more joy God placed in my heart! Make no mistake that this choice on what to dwell on is not easy-and sometimes I fail miserably. But I am doing my very best.
"Finally bretheren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy-meditate on these things."
- Philippians 4:8
So what's news you ask? (Ann I know that you are going to kill me for not telling you this morning at church!) This month we found out that we are expecting again! I can't express how strange it is to know that this baby would not have been had Brinley lived. I know that there will be a bittersweetness that she will not be here to greet her new brother or sister again. But I also see the blessing in new life, the beauty from ashes, and the joy that my God continues to provide.

6 comments:

Rachel said...

Congrats, Brinley's mom! (I don't know your first name but feel the need to "know" you by something.)
I will be praying for healthy mom and healthy baby.

Annabelle said...

What great news! I did notice today you seemed really happy at church. I'm so happy for you...Kill you, no, I still feel like I'm in that "special club" of knowing early! *hugs* and prayers...let me know if there's ANYTHING you need! As far as the baby clothes...no need to pass them along, we'll talk to them about not having them!

The Morris Family said...

How exciting!! I have read about others that have had their little ones enter heaven and then be blessed again, it reminds me of the story of Job, he does take but He also gives. May the Lord bless you with a healthy pregnancy. God is faithful even in our darkest hour....
Cindy (Joel's mommy)

Susie (So Blessed) said...

Congratulations...and thank you, Lord, for such a wonderful blessing.

boltefamily said...

Oh my gosh! I am so excited for you! that is amazing news! What a happy new year gift! Please keep me posted. We can pray eachother through this exciting time! YAY!

Amanda in RI said...

Congratulations! That is wonderful news!

I do know what you mean. Whenever I get to missing my Abigail too much, I look at my other children. We would have had more kids, but we wouldn't have THESE kids, if you know what I mean. Abigail would have been in the hospital, and I certainly wouldn't have gotten pregnant 11 weeks after having her!

Congratulations, again. Isn't God good?